To late for me I'll be gone in the next hour
You wouldn't have gotten on here if you didn't want help.
I can relate to pain. I was in a screwed up life myself back in 97. Tried to kill myself with carbon dioxide. It didn't work.
Today my life is far better than I could have ever imagined. Whatever is going on right now seems like it won't pass but it will. I know it's hard to believe right now but you're not thinking right. Don't trust your own thinking right now. If you call that number you'll be on here not long from now happy that you did. It will pass.
God help me to do the right thing.
God is the only reason I'm alive
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That's what I like to hear.
Amen
I'm glad you're here Barbara.
I'm just a man who is happily married now because I became willing to make the changes but I will talk/text anytime you need.
Life gets better but we have to be willing to take the steps.
It worked for me.
I thought it was all BS but I was wrong.
Sobriety is the easier softer way.
It's bs they making me go to rehab when I know I haven't done shit take two drug test in one day failed the first one passed the second one.
I was clean for 7 years till my ex and my brother made 3 false dss reports in two weeks cuz they didn't like who I was with yea u take my baby from me what did they think I wasn't gonna releaspe. Before the even done a drug test on me they took her fuck that man. Is not fair and right when Im not doing shit and u take. My baby.
Why would you want to leave your kids?
Donāt you think your kids are worth living for?ļæ¼
Do you like yourself?
Do you let your brother and your ex destroy your seven years. Thatās OK. Because WE Can you get them seven years back and then some. You just need to do the work like you did before. Taking your life isnāt worth it. Iāve always thought the same thing taking my life everybody else will be better off. But the only person thatās gonna be better off as me. Because I donāt have to Deal with this shit anymore if I take my life.
I have been sober for 37 years and Iām not bragging. Iāve been through a lot of shit in those 37 years. Almost picked up a few times but I worked my program. Thereās nothing like working your program itās the greatest thing that I ever gave myself. I love who I am today. And one thing Iāve learned to the program thereās nothing or anybody can cause me to go back out again. Only myself.
I know these are things you can probably donāt wanna hear. But these are things that you need to hear. So please donāt let people run your life for you. You can run your life yourself and be better at it.
Thereās nothing in this world they can make you do something you donāt want to do. You just Gotta be strong and ask for help thatās what we are here for. And I promise you did things do get better but it takes time.
You said you were alive because of God. Well. God doesn't make mistakes. Lean on Him and us for strength. We're here for you and so is He. You can beat this. It will get better in time. 26 years sober and I still do it one day at a time..
Reach out 
How are you?