For the last few days my thoughts keep going back to where and who I was. I think about all I threw away and how long I let alcohol rule my life. It is still weighing me down but I keep reminding myself of how far I've come. It took my over 10 years to dig this hole. I know it will take much longer than that to get to where I want to be but I'm trying.
Try to remind yourself every day of how brave your choice to face your demons is even when it's difficult.
How do you stay positive?
The mind unfortunately likes to hit the rewind button a lot and reflect on the past . I think it’s just a part of being human . Looking back at the past and perceived “wasted time “ can be tough and easy to fall into a spiral of self loathing and negativity . What I like to remind myself is that my struggle with alcohol and all that entailed in the past brought me to where I am today . It is a part of my story and a very powerful part of my story . This experience has taught me so much that no other experience in life has taught me and it can be used to help people . That’s priceless. And unless you are 100 years old , you have plenty of time to embrace this new lifestyle and become the best version of yourself .
Keep up the Good work Melissa! You can do this!
It’s very important to forgive yourself to embrace the new you and stay positive, since you forgave other why not yourself, it’s time to let the self guilt go and move on otherwise you will be hunted by those thoughts for ever and that lead to bad decisions, stay strong
I try to stay out of morbid reflection it doesn’t serve me and it just gets in the way of me doing good for others. That’s how I keep my positive energy going. Being of service to others no matter how small I try to do stuff every day
When my thoughts turn to morbid reflection, I FORCE myself to do something. Anything. I remind myself that residual guilt and shame had zero value for promoting my present mental health. When I allow negative thoughts to dictate my emotions I am choosing to backslide into old familiar patterns of thoughts and behaviors. Forcing myself into ANY sort of action has been working for me. It's simple but not easy. But if I can do it. I know you can
My experience with what your expressing/feeling in early recovery it was shame and guilt based that I explored with a therapist. Over time these feelings for me have been based on regret. I see regret as missed opportunity. Because I know in my heart, I could have been and can be a better me. The resolve I have found is pursuing that "better me" everyday. This includes gratitude, self-care, helping others asking for help, to name a few. I had to practice being kind to myself and others. The process that leads us to our serenity takes time. I have found humor to be a good tool , given my lived experience it is a bit dark. But that's ok. Have a nice day, Melissa! 
When you are new to recovery, it takes some time , for your thoughts to change , for you to get Vin touch with your emotions, like you said , we spent years developing a certain life we make and we just have to give this new way of life the same energy. Stay the course , it’s soooo worth it . Life on life’s terms isn’t always easy but it gets better!
You can’t drive a car if all you do is stare at the rear view mirror. Focus on what’s ahead and occasionally look back just so you don’t forget where you came from and what you don’t want to go back too
Be patient and kind with yourself. You have great things ahead...I truly believe that! I think I am able to stay positive because life is SO much easier when I accept where I am at today. And I'm grateful for it because I was so sick for so long that any day now is a million times better than where I was. Keep plugging along and you will continue to find happiness. I just know it!
I feel you Melissa, I have been feeling the same way this last week or so. I I just can't seem to get out of my head and my emotions are all over the place....it's lousy!
As everyone else has said it can be difficult to stay positive.
I have to speak positive affirmations, know this too shall pass, give myself kudos for learning from my mistakes, and being better than I was yesterday.
Thank you Stephen. Yes, "wasted time " is what hits me the hardest. Just knowing I could have done more. I am trying to help others as much as I can and now volunteering and trying to help others as much as I can. Your right. It does come down to acknowledging this is a new lifestyle.
That is a good point. I do find it much easier to forgive others than myself. Thank you!
Thanks Mike. I'm not sure if this is exactly what you meant but I have started trying to do something constructive even if all I can accomplish is working on housework. At least it's something to keep my mind from going too far down a rabbit hole.
I do like saying "better me" as opposed to "best me" too 
! I'm not great at it obviously but, it does remind me this will be a continuous journey.
Thank you Rob. Sometimes I do just want a fast track to "back to normal " ... but really I don't think there was ever a healthy normal for me. So yep, stay the new course 
I need to write this on my wall!
yes! Great reminder. I was so sick too. And I am just amazed at how my body actually functions correctly without a constant hangover and complete alcohol dependency Who knew ?
Daily Affirmations are great. I do think getting back into a habit of those would be helpful. I was doing them while I was in the hospital.