Does anyone else feel like they are having trouble with socializing in longterm recovery?
2 Likes
I do. I'm an introvert. I'm sure that's most of my problem.
3 Likes
Ya that would definitely make alot of sense.
Yes its hard , if like me I met a lady in a meeting that after 10 years she drank her self to death, it really was hard to socialize, it took practice but im getting better, I have 11 years sober from all mind altering chemicals
4 Likes
Yup. Socializing often revolves around alcohol and bars. I’m a bit of an introvert as it is, so I’ve found it really challenging to socialize comfortably in my post-booze life.
3 Likes
Oh yeah!!! I’m an introvert and socially awkward. I relied on opiates to relax me and make me feel comfortable for 20 plus years. Now after 18 months of recovery, I’m still feeling weird and anxious about socializing.
2 Likes
Ya see, I think it's that after a fair amount of sobriety and me not being a complete train wreck, I'm seeing again and it's just weird to me lol
Some difficulty socializing but also just anticipatory anxiety about dating sober.
1 Like
Very well said. I actually had an issue with a past date a few months back where the girl couldn't get over the fact that I didn't consume alcohol
I have a date tomorrow and I don't want to drink. But I feel like he's going to judge me/think I'm no fun....
1 Like
Then why do you want to go out with him?
My thera-friend (friendapist?) made me write down a dating wishlist and then dating deal breakers. I learned that I can date anyone who isn’t a Trump supporter or in active addiction. Or who wants to have more babies. But I now have to add to my deal breaker list anyone who doesn’t celebrate my sobriety.
1 Like
Oh, and I get enough socialization through work, meetings, fellowship, service and the very occasional hang out with my normies.
1 Like
I think that I'm going to have to start making up fun things that I did on the weekends. People at work always ask how was your weekend... I'm kinda lame since I quit drinking just over 6 years ago. I used to be a bar fly and almost all of my friends still drink. So I sit at home on the weekends.
1 Like
It’s learning who we really are. For me I know I’m a completely different person Sober and working my program. Even to the point that in the past I was sober with no program and I was different.
I’m learning to love myself and respect myself and be at peace. Once we can figure this out socializing becomes easier. I still struggle with people pleasing. Learning to just be in the moment and not in the spotlight
2 Likes
I’m trying to find hobbies that I really enjoy and then the people I meet will have similar interests so socializing isn’t as difficult. I still have the same problem though but I’m working on it
1 Like
Yeah this is a huge problem for me and I’m trying to push myself into uncomfortable situations but the anxiety is really intense sometimes and it makes having a conversation difficult
1 Like
I’m socially awkward and have severe anxiety. I used drugs to numb that, and I had no issues. Now being sober, I’m learning to socialize with no drugs. I will admit I’m having a really rough time..
2 Likes
I am just getting started - 41 days. I am just being social at work and with family. I go to bed early. After some sober time, I will slowly add some social stuff. Being with my social group always involves drinking. I don’t need that kind of trigger right now
2 Likes
One thing that I have noticed is how you are treated differently. It is strange
1 Like
If you dont mind sharing, how are you treated differently?
I am newly sober and besides work i have avoided social situations because im too nervous my friends and family will notice im not drinking and the conversations that will lead to. Im too nervous to tell them im not drinking anymore.