Why do i self sabotage? Cannot have a social life? Does a social life mean sobriety suicide? When does it become easier? Do I have what it takes? When a 14 year old has better discipline than myself; what is that saying?
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Only you can answer that question. Maybe with the help of a therapist or another professional? That’s the only way I was able to figure out why I was constantly causing destruction and chaos in my own life. And girl, my cats have more discipline than me 
don’t be so hard on yourself, you’re doing your best.
I feel you.I have turned inward myself.For the time being,I half feel that it is whats best.Not to mention,I am clueless as to how people make new friends,and 100% certain that I had to let many go,for the right reasons.