There are a lot of posts from people who failed at their attempt to stop using. After one or two days or even a few months. It is disheartening and discouraging to say the least. But many of us have been there. You wonder why have I done this again knowing how it was going to turn out. Then you get mad, strengthen your resolve and say this is it, it's not going to happen again. Then it does. Repeat. The harsh truth is that maybe you just weren't ready. I can tell you from my experience that I had many of those start over days. Many days which I stood my ground said this is not going to happen again, I am done , only to fail. We all have to hit that bottom before we actually can turn it around. The bottom for each person is different. But for me, I knew I was there when I was completely resigned to the fact that I just could not go on living the way I was living anymore. I got tired of waking up wishing I was dead. I was tired of living everyday in misery and wanting to be dead. You would not believe what it took for me to get to that point. When I was finally there I had lost so much,and done so much damage, that it didn't matter anymore to anyone if I stop drinking or not, my life was over. I lost everything including my freedom.But there was something inside of me that said I didn't want to go out that way, it did matter to me. I had no reason and no incentive to live life without being intoxicated or in a drug-induced coma at that point. But there was a part of me that wanted to make right all the wrongs.There was something inside of me that said I'm not going to end my life this way this is not the way I want to be remembered. So my journey of living sober began. And all those problems that we encounter, all the difficulties we go through, the physical pain the depression. I encountered those things daily and I took it right on the chin. And I began to notice that the pain that I was experiencing then, was worth the effort to make my life right. It was so hard that I knew I could not do it without God's help. Because though I was sober, I still woke up everyday locked up and wanting to die. There was no light at the end of the tunnel for me that's how bad it was. So what was the point of being sober if it didn't matter? It mattered to me. Even though I had every reason to give up. It mattered to me. And I lived that way, for 28 years and 10 months. Today I'm clean sober and I have been all this time. I made all the wrongs right. Today I'm successful in life as man , and a human being that doesn't want anyone to go through what I did to get clean and sober. God Bless all of you, please don't give up.
I know what it means to feel the pain that you're feeling no matter what it is
Thanks for sharing this Larry! I can tell it's from the heart. I have to agree- putting God first helps a lot. I don't know where I'd be without Him and don't want to find out.
I'm glad you are sober and thanks a million for being a resource.
Yes. Stories like this help alot for someone like me. I've quit a million times and I'm sure I sound like a broken record when I say I'm done but I don't care I will never give up. One day it will click. I hope this time is it. Day 6. 
Thank you so much for the encouragement!
Thank you.
Great post Larry, seriously man. That's stuff people need to hear.
Thank you for sharing. Today is another day 1 for me. But I don't want to keep killing myself anymore. You're inspiring. Keep sharing.
One day at a time is a cliche but it's true. If you feel like using reach out, personally I'm on here every day, both for support or to help other people, don't be shy if you start feeling that itch
People make an attempt to stop but they usually fail because they go about it the wrong way. They relapse because they don't understand what is making them want to use alcohol or drugs to begin with. in the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous, I love what it says in the Doctor's Opinion.
Men and women drink essentially because they like the effect produced by alcohol. The sensation is so elusive that, while they admit it is injurious, they cannot after a time differentiate the true from the false. To them, their alcoholic life seems the only normal one. They are restless, irritable and discontented (Did you catch that?) unless they can again experience the sense of ease and comfort which comes at once by taking a few drinks—drinks which they see others taking with impunity. After they have succumbed to the desire again, as so many do, and the phenomenon of craving develops, they pass through the well-known stages of a spree, emerging remorseful, with a firm resolution not to drink again. This is repeated over and over, and unless this person can experience an entire psychic change there is very little hope of his recovery.”
Nice share , Dave. Thank you.