I am still drinking. I am a generation drinker. I am sick of myself. Been to rehab 2 years ago. Mostly dealing with my Mom's?shit. She has beenldead since 1995. I do not understand why this still haunts me.
Hey Sue, sorry about losing your mom. I lost my mom 7 years ago, I feel like it got easier at first, but then got pretty hard recently. Each year is different, each month is different. my partners mom passed in Feb from alcoholism, same as my mom & I feel like that dug a lot up again. anyway Ive Been sober over 4 years and have consistently gone to therapy to deal with my grief, shame, and guilt around her loss. I was not able to face anything or heal in any significant way over her loss in active addiction. Also I know a lot of people who have had to go to treatment multiple times to get & stay sober, It doesn’t make you any less of a person just bc you went 2 years ago and are still drinking. If you feel like you need treatment again you should go. Or if you think a 12 step group might be beneficial you should go to that. stay plugged in here on Loosid- we support you Sue. 
That drink Won’t let things go of pain
Hi, Sue. I'm sorry about your mom. I lost my dad to alcoholism 9 years ago. Like Rachel I've been having a more difficult time lately about his death.
You'll have to find a way to cope. Rachel seeks therapy. I've found hope in God.
Hang in there. I'm sorry that you're hurting.
You can end the generational drinking with you. My brothers and I did. If we can you can.
Medicating pain with substance abuse is like putting a bandage on an infected cut. It won't make the cut better. It makes it worse. You need to get at the root of the problem. Open the cut, clean it out, and take antibiotics. The problem is it is really painful, and just bandaging it up hurts less. You want things to get better, you may need to seek help for the pain you are trying to cover.