So I’ve been struggling to stay sober. I can get 3 or 4 months and everything will be going great and then for no reason I can figure out I pickup again. So tired of this cycle and it gets harder every time. I’m open to chatting with anyone that has struggled similarly in the past.
I went to AA initially. I still go now. I too could not stay sober on my own for more than 3-4 months. I needed to re-construct my brain and spirit. Working the 12 steps did that for me. I went to 90 meetings in 90 days, got a sponsor and bought all the literature...
Thanks Aimee. Been to 45 day rehab done the 90 in 90 (probably more) have sponsee home group and commitment. Haven’t finished the steps yet though. Started them multiple times but then restarted due to relapse. Times I pickup just seem to happen. I can’t seem to think before that first drink. I am thinking about a new sponsee to move through the steps faster. Just tired of living this way and looking for any additional ideas or help.
Spoke to psychiatrist today. I binged last night after my car broke down. No logic, rhyme or reason of how that turned into going out and getting hammered. So he told me that’s why I am talking to him, is because the decisions I make do not make sense. Essentially once we start thinking about drinking, everything else stops mattering and we come up with excuses to do just that. He told me I need to be more vigilant and expect it before I plan to step my foot outside my door - that my brain will play tricks on me and prepare to fight it...
Self will is the problem. The difference between the winners and the loosers is. The winners do what they have to do. The loosers do what they want to do. Again self will. Run riot
Before I joined AA I couldn’t get sober… I couldn’t walk out the house without taking another hit or sip… I had to put myself in treatment but it took me being on the street and losing everything.. treatment introduced me to AA that was 15 years ago. Right now I go to meetings and do what I can
Anton - I completely agree with you. Being more prepared. Once things start going good I let my guard down.