My spouse bought a breathalyzer and randomly asks me to take it. I am pretty new on the path to sobriety. I think it’s causing more paranoia but I understand it helps them feel better.
Would love thoughts from a neutral party! Helpful or hurtful??
Could be helpful? But I hate that idea. My spouse wouldn’t need a breathalyzer because it would be obvious if I had been drinking and I would simply tell her in the first place. If you are a regular human in recovery, no one needs to drug test you unless you have a long history of lying about your drinking. It’s really invasive and a boundary violation. According to me. Maybe not for you?
Plus you are in recovery. Who is helping you feel better?
Mmmm I would def not be ok with that.. but that’s just me. Like the previous poster said before me that’s a boundary violation and does not show any trust at all. I would want support from my spouse.
I think it creates a power dynamic that can be problematic. It also sounds like it is exacerbating emotional regulation issues that typically undergird substance use disorders. There is a lot more to an alcohol use disorder than just using alcohol in orivlemaric ways.
I agree with everyone who posted before me which is fun. Here is my take. Why is he doing it? How many times have you hid drinking while claiming you were sober? How bad did you destroy trust? What are you willing to go through to rebuild it?
Personally I am open to always breathylizing. As I’m almost 8 months sober, I have nothing to hide. The steps have taight me to be an open book and 100% transparent and honest. I also take into consideration that my actions in the past has affected my family in such a negative way, and its hard for them to know for sure that you have changed. It’s normal for your loved ones to have anxiety. If you are sober and have nothing to hide, I would just embrace it with open arms. Radical acceptance!!!!