My friend has a lot of family issues

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#1

My friend has a lot of family issues. I hear stuff from both sides. I don't want to hear it anymore- but my friend needs to vent to me each time. I think all of them are in the wrong. But I don't want to hear it anymore because it upsets me; and it makes me feel that my friend needs too much of my time because of her family issues.

She doesn't respect my schedule. If I don't answer my phone she just shows up, calls my husband, or calls me until I answer. She called me 4 times in less than an hour because she needed help and it wasn't an emergency.

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#2

This sounds like codependency. My advice for you would be to set your boundaries. Easier said than done for sure. Also understand that codependency is feeling the responsibility to help the other person as well as that person needing your time. It is a difficult concept to understand, and a harder one to deal with.

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#3

I respect you Amanda and your husband for the work you do here

#4

Erik has a really good point about boundaries. Unfortunately (or maybe fortunately from a growth standpoint) it's gonna be up to you to both set and maintain them. I'm no expert, in fact I'm really bad at setting healthy boundaries, so I'm acutely aware of how difficult it is. It always seems easier when I'm looking in from the outside