My bf is just a week out of treatment Im worried about him he’s been kind of distant and I’m not sure he’s following up with aftercare… I really don’t want to see him relapse😢
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U r powerless over his recovery or relapse. Focus ur finite time & energy working on ur own recovery/codependency.
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Yea you can say codependency again
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Eric is right focus on yourself instead of somebody else’s recovery. I know that something you probably don’t wanna hear. But maybe that’s what he has to do is relapse To see what it’s actually like again. Or maybe he’s just not ready for it yet. One thing I’ve learned in recovery is that you can’t help those that don’t wanna help themselves.
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It’s actually pretty common to go to al anon and aa simultaneously. Codependency is very common for alcoholics/addicts. When we can’t seem to fix ourselves we focus on fixing others. But that’s not what a healthy relationship feels like and deep down we know it.
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Al-anon has helped people I know from AA tremendously. There’s lots of people there that have been in your shoes. Be patient and you’ll hear your own story from others.
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Keep up the good work! Having compassion for others is wonderful growth! Boundaries are healthy when properly placed.
I’m 584 days clean and sober. I struggle watching my dad continue down the obsession of the mind path. It would make me so mad at him for the way he would think, act and talk. I would tell him what to do, how to act and how to talk. It would get me so riled up that a simple conversation would end up in a verbal fight. My point is today I’m able to except him for who he is. With my new tools I’m learning in sobriety I’m able to better communicate with my dad in a more loving way. Even when he gets into he’s Debby downer tantrums, where everything sucks, I now can be calm and relaxed. DBT skills is wonderful tool to have. Patience is the key. Helping another addict with action of your own sobriety. My dad told me tonight how much his can see the changes I’ve made. And that was more powerful then any words I could have ever told him that I was going to do. Words are powerless-action is powerful.
Have a blessed evening filled with love and peace within.
Don't worry, worry will take care of its self, just stay sober for your self, BFs will come and go, your sobriety is what really counts