and i'm not sure where to find me…
i've lost myself after a 10 month drug induced relationship.
i sit and listen to the noises of the world and wonder where at in it i'm suppose to be…i feel so out of place here anymore…i think i'd like a friend…but then again, people are human and humans are beautiful yet evil at the same time.
You have to find who you are. I allowed a toxic relationship to get me out of character. I desired a relationship with that person deeply. It took me years to realize this person was manipulative. 'Til this day no matter what I do is wrong in this person's eyes.
I had to love me. I realized what I was before this person came in my life. I didn't deserve what this person was doing or saying to me. I didn't deserve that this person told others I was in the wrong while I was constantly being belittled by this person. This person was mad at me for treating him/her like family.
The point is people can be toxic. You have to let them go. When we don't we become emotional, worn-out, fill of unnecessary weight.
You're worth so much more! Find yourself. Remember the good, how happy you were before- and do everything you can to be that person again.
I too have lost a wonderful part of me. But I'll be damn if I'm going to let myself go.
If you would like to talk or just need that support or kind conversation, I'll be right here.
We got this.
Hey I used to feel the same way! I used to be super hesitant and think everyone was always willing to screw me over bc thats what ALWAYS would happen but I was always in a negative mindset & hanging Around with people in active addiction, aka other miserable people. Once I got sober I realized i could change my Mindset & once I did that I started realizing that most people are actually good. Most people have good intentions. It’s just easier to focus on the negative when things are always negative. My suggestion is to get involved with a 12 step program & see how things change
Focus on one thing a day.. like eating right or drawing.. or just making your bed. Forget people. People will always be there treat yourself nice.
Did you ever know yourself?
If so how would you recognize that your true self is before you.?
What worked for me when I felt this way and had these thoughts.
Was,
Instead of struggling with these questions.
I began to ask myself different questions like,
What do I like to do?
What food do I find tasty?
What music do I remember can make me dance?
What hobbies do I have?
Can I create new ones.
In fact since you don't know yourself.
Think of this as a fresh start.
Like when you started a new year of school.
Get excited to learn who you are and where you're at and how to get where you want to be.
I was also in a toxic relationship for a few years and I had to be the one to make a move. I had to move away and start over. It's one of the hardest choices I've made but I did find peace and I'm finding myself.
I can relate totally with u I have been sober for almost 3 years but the guy I am with drinks everyday and gets really mean I love him to death but it's really messing with my recovery I am trying to deal with it the best I can
When you find God he will let you understand your self and others I promise God bless
I cannot change the past. What's done is done. The only thing I can do now is to take care of the present. And if I stay in the “now,” the future will take care of itself. Now, while it sounds simple, and it is, it doesn't always mean that it is easy. But it IS possible, because others have come before me and paved the way. Also, as someone suggested, please check out the 12 Steps. The Steps have changed my life for the better!! Thank you.
I wish I had advice. Im in a similar thought as you.
I can relate. Sticky situation.. Wish you the best on your clean slate!
Sometimes people bo the need people who will stand by them it grows a closer relationship
I'm glad you had the willpower to leave that relationship. That doesn't sound good at all.
Don't give up! I'vebeen in toxic relationships too. Fuck. Sometimes I was the toxic one. We're all human, and trying to find our way. It just takes a little more effort for some of us. Lmk if you need to vent!
Hey, @liz8817. We're in this together. What's going on?