i am preparing myself with meditation to go and perform tonight. i often find myself in environments stricken with the insanity of intoxication. sometimes we have to use masks and body armor to protect ourselves from unconsciousness. it’s not bad or good. it’s just reality and that’s okay. i don’t consider it a permanent solution, but i’m smart enough to know my own weaknesses and what i need to do to survive. i would rather use a crutch while i get my bearings, as opposed to falling off the cliff. anything but that is still a win and even that is not death, but i would rather not fall tonight. just wanted to get that out there so i’m reminded. 
Mindfulness and meditation are highly effective! I find 4 square breathing also beneficial. You are stronger than you think you are. You can do this.
Asher i have never heard of 4 square breathing. thank you for this. a lot of shenanigans out there, but i feel solid tonight. hope the same to you!
made it through my concert tonight and actually had a great time! sometimes when i start to get clear-headed, i ask myself what i am doing in these venues that are so rampant with the obviousness of addiction and avoidance..then i just had a moment of peace and realized it was not my job to save the world tonight. there were children there and other sober people. tonight my job was to have fun, enjoy my gifts, share my talent and just help people feel a little bit happier than they were before they arrived. i do hope i can make a bigger impact someday soon (now that i’m sober and driven again), but for now - entertainer doesn’t seem so bad. life could be MUCH worse. to everyone tonight!
No doubt, it could always be worse. I'm glad you made it through! Thanks for reaching out. And, I agree maybe it isn't your job to save the world, but maybe you could be an example that others who are struggling can look up too. With solid ways of coping and finding replacements for the chemical substances formerly relied upon, your relationship with sobriety will be unstoppable! P.s. I have found milkshakes beneficial in moments where unavoidable cravings kick-in 