How does everyone deal with the emotional part of stopping alcohol? I lost someone I loved dearly because of my drinking. I have deep regrets and I’m beating myself up over it daily. I’m now feeling the lows that come after quitting. Any suggestions?
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The hardest part of recovery is forgiving ourselves. We all have so much we regret. You have to remind yourself the person you hold responsible isn't you anymore.
Have you reached out to this person now that you’ve sober? They may have forgiven you and be ready to move forward if you’ve changed.
Regardless of if their perception you are a new person on a new path. If necessary, feel free to speak with a therapist.
Weirdly enough, sometimes using logic helps me to have a better grip on my emotions. When I’m experiencing regret or remorse or shame (any typically negative emotion) I try and sit down and really think about how it’s serving me. Is being ashamed of my past changing what I’ve done? No. Is regretting mistakes I’ve made undoing those mistakes? Not at all ... I try to keep myself focused on the present and what I DO have control over today
Steve S. is right. Let that old man/woman die. It isn't easy. Their will be people places and things that not only temp you to use but constantly remind you of your old actions when you did. But this is no time to grieve but celebrate your rebirth and leave that other person buried in the past. This not to pretend it didn't happen but to remember it won't any longer.
Jodi, I couldn't stop for anybody, and you usually hurt everyone who loves because they want you to stop too. But you can't let that control you. I mean you will stay drunk for the rest of your life to cover up the pain that you're having. You can't blame yourself and you have to ask God to help you to forgive you, because He will forgive. And you let it go and then ask God daily to give you strength to stay sober. Because what will happen is all those people who you hurt, will forgive you too. But you have to stay sober.
Emotional rollercoaster is pretty normal in the beginning but if you stay involved in recovery it does get better. The 12 steps, meetings, and service work keeps me grounded but we all have to find our strength somewhere. For me it's a power greater than self!
Emotions will be there even stronger when you are sober. You'll feel everything you've been trying subconciously to numb. The trick is to welcome those feelings. Explore why you feel the way you do even if it hurts.
Meditation is a good way to start taking control of your mind.
Hp get a hp get to meetings.. dnt beat yourself up.. it will happen but dnt overwhelm u.. u can work on that later.. focus o meetings and getting an hp and building network..