He promised he wouldnt leave me and we would go thru this shit together. But he did and I'm all alone and idk what I'm supposed to think of what happened or how I'm supposed to feel.. I'm so fuckin angry tho... how could you leave me like that!!! 
And I'm so fuckin hurt why did you do this and leave me like that:sob:
I needed you. You promised....
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Calmm down. I mean no disrespect at all when I say this... You're a beautiful white woman in America. If dude left yu he obviously didn't know he had a good thing. You will find someone who believe deserves to be with you. Just remember you are a queen and deserve better than that. Yu be iight lol
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I can relate all too well Lindsay. 
always here if you need to talk/vent 
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Your not supposed to feel or act anyway...start with identifying the facts. Look at the list cross off all that you can not control and let it go.
What your left with is a good start to move forward with your journey.
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No it's not a boyfriend.... my best friend passed away the day before yesterday... we had decided to get sober together and I guess he relapsed.
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Lindsay, I don't believe that people can simply look down and see us once they have passed away. I don't see any evidence to support that theory. But I will tell you this. If I was your friend and I could look down I would want you to go on with your life and continue to move forward in your journey. That's what I would truly want.
It's okay to mourn your friend being gone. None of us really know what is going to happen tomorrow. This can be a lesson for all of us to not take anyone's presence for granted. Get with some ladies in the program because right now is not a good time to be alone. That's my advice to you.
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Sometimes in grief we must continue on inspire of how we feel. We must carry the torch forward so that we can endure the dark days ahead. Be angry. Be sad. Let yourself grieve. But keep moving forward.
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So sorry Lindsay. Be strong!
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The other thing I want to say is that this is a good reason why we can't trust human beings for our own happiness. Your freind made a decision to relapse. I don't think he wanted to hurt you. He just wasn't abe to find it in himself to keep his promise. This goes to say why quitting for any other reason than our desire is a dead end. You have to want sobriety. I mean really want it. What he did and what happened is out of your control. But you still have choices and you can learn from his mistake.
God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change. Courage to change the things I can. And the wisdom to know the difference.
Amen
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Be strong. Apparently he wasn’t ready or able. Maybe he needed space. One thing seems certain you want this change or you wouldn’t have put yourself out there. I’m just over 40 some days sober and believe me if I’m doing it anyone can. Specially if a person is willing to ask for help as well as help themselves. So think about this. You can do this. You can also use this opportunity to show him what he is missing out on. Maybe even give him the strength to get himself better. Either way when we do what we need over what we want we take the power away from that which drags us down and at that point the skies the limit. So in my eyes you may be better off. I’m sorry for that and I don’t know you but. What has hurt me the most is that the people that I cared so deeply for and thought they cared about me ended up being what held me down. Keep your head up. And honestly my phone is always on and I check it often. Feel free to reach out anytime for anything. I’m a heavy sleeper but if I hear my phone even in the middle of the night I will reply and be here to listen. We don’t have to do this alone. I hope something I said helps. And I mean everything I say specially now that I’m staying sober. And again sorry if I sounded disrespectful at anytime. With the best wishes for you and him. You can do this. 
🥸
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My condolences for your loss. But you have 400 plus days of sobriety. 400+ days of experience, strength and hope to share with the addict who still suffers. Look how far you’ve come. You’re getting your own apartment!!
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Thank you Ryan
Thanks. And none taken.
I know and I'm so excited... just got to find someone to show it off to and celebrate with.
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I’m so sorry
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Don't be. Maybe his purpose was to show me unconditional love and to learn that all it takes is a bad batch or one too many... So I guess I'll I'll remember him both in a positive light and negative, but both for the good.
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Amen