Currently struggling with the idea of still not being able

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#1

Currently struggling with the idea of still not being able to be happy even in sobriety. Where does that leave me to go ?

#2

If you're not happy you may need therapy or change what's going on around you. Why are you unhappy?

#3

How long have you been sober? And also what do you define as happiness? Everyone’s threshold for “happiness“ is actually quite different. Mental health is a huge part of it. Society tells you somethings wrong with you if you aren’t happy 24/7. but the reality of life is, well it kind of sucks a lot. the point is, with happiness there is always suffering. the entire religion of buddhism is based on the idea that we can never be completely “happy” & accepting that. Life is about finding equanimity & balance. Meditation & mindfulness help, try to stop “searching“ for happiness & try to do more of what makes you feel “good“ and sober. For me that’s remaining open & being compassionate and of service & happiness did come.

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#4

Thank you for the advice Rachel and I am current 97 days sober. as I entered my recovery I had the preconceived notion that sobriety would bring me happiness but of course that was not realistic or how it works. my expectations fell short and it’s very anticlimactic. not sure if you can relate or not

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#5

Oh for sure I can relate, it’s hard so hard to regulate emotions I mean I would STRONGLY consider going to therapy at least to build up some ways to regulate your emotions. Have you heard of DBT? There are a lot of resources online look up DBTselfHelp.com it’s kind of a corny website but tons of great information, about mindfulness & fairly simple stuff to do on your own if you can’t go to therapy right away…. it’s mostly about mindfulness. Also there’s this book called “DBT SKILLS TRAINING: handouts and worksheets“ by Marsha Linehan if you google that it’ll bring you to this free resource on this CPTSD website with the entire book online….. anywya it’s just a bunch of options to help kind of navigate feelings. For me mindfulness is really important or I get super depressed & feel like it’s super difficult to be happy. I get it, I have almost 5 years sober & still struggle to be happy but I feel “good“ when I’m doing things I value & working towards my values - which I figured out using DBT & therapy. Also eastern medicine / accupuncture has been extremely beneficial as well as 12 step fellowship