Yesterday was the kick off off of children of alcoholics awareness week.
I know statistics show that children who live in homes with addiction often follow suite. Anyone have experience with this and want to share? Maybe your story will help others, maybe sharing will help you too.
I'll share. I grew up in a house with an alcoholic. My dad made lots of mistakes. Most were extremely hard to forgive.
My brothers and I have been told that we should get over it and be happy that our dad didn't kill us. Adults didn't help us because the situation wasn't their business. People didn't believe us because of the person they saw when my dad was sober and he couldn't be that mean under the influence. Or the plethora of officers who didn't arrest my dad for his abuse because if my 10 year old brother didn't have a slick mouth he wouldn't get abused.
My story is why I decided that alcohol wouldn't be part of future as a young adult. I loved who my dad was sober. But I was terrified to sleep when he was drunk because I was terrified of what he would do.
Yes, my dad was a great man with great qualities. But who he was when he was drunk took so much away from my mom, brothers, and me. I decided I wasn't going to make my future spouse and children go through what I went through. That's why I decided to end my relationship with alcohol early.
It was hard on those rough days. Now I have my HP to guide me.
Today I have a brother who struggles with addiction because of what he went through and what he saw.
Please note I am not attacking the alcoholic- I'm addressing the fact that people who should have protected me as a child were more concerned with the rights of dad. Some in authority have so much apathy towards the victim; and that's where I'm coming from. I strongly believe that if my dad was held for his actions things wouldn't have been that bad.
Great post, Steve. I grew up with a mother who was in the throes of alcoholism. And a father who was an active heroin addict. My mom got sober when I was around 3 or 4. And my father is no longer in my life, and still active. I’ve spent a lot of time working out the ways in which my childhood has affected the way I go about my life now. I feel I’m mostly healed from these things, but for a long time I suffered from an intense fear of abandonment and the need to people-please. I also had a lot of tumultuous relationships I think bc I learned what love was like from looking at my parents. I’m glad there’s support and more treatment options out there now, so not as many kids have to go through the struggles that come with growing up with parents who are addicted.
Thank you for sharing this Amanda. I can relate to a lot of it.
Ugh. 
I hate that you can relate. My childhood is definitely something I don't want others to relate to. All the same I'm glad we connect on another level though.
hugs
Steve, I’ve been curious. Do you have a story to share?
Not so much my story. My dad was the son of an alcoholic. Grandpa was, as they called it, a mean drunk. That meant he come home and fight grandma. I say fight instead of beat Because she once laid hi. Open from crotch to knee with a can opener, so she could definitely hold her own.
When dad was 12 his older brother threw grandpa down the stairs to stop him from hitting his mom. Grandma decided to leave.
In those days the stigma of divorce was still huge and grandma had already had one before grandpa so the court talked her into staying if he quit drinking. He never drank again.
My dad decided after a blackout drinking that he was off the booze when he was around 19, but his sister became a partier.
I grew up hearing all of this so I've never chosen to take the risk. I did see what it did to my family and because I worked in foodservice where addiction seems to be the norm I have always been an ally to recovery. That is my story, and I'm sticking to it.
Wow, Steve! Thanks for sharing. I’m glad you didn’t let addiction rule you.
My heart breaks for your grandma. I’m glad things eventually worked out for your grandparents. I wish that was the same for each couple.
Thanks for reading Kristi. Sharing can be hard at times. I find myself dealing with the emotions all over again. But if I can help someone else it’s worth it.
Thanks for sharing Steve!