Any women out their struggling with intimacy with their partners? I am 34 days sober from alcohol and my husband is always in the mood. I have never had a problem in this department and would like some reassurance that my sex drive will come back.
1 Like
Hi Samantha. Many go through this. Some get it back. Some don't. Those I know who don't get it back because they don't enjoy sober intimacy. I'm not trying to make you fearful. Have you spoken with a doctor about it?
From a guy’s perspective: I lost the drive for a bit after getting sober I was fearful of my performance and intimacy with my wife because whenever we were intimate I was mostly always under the influence and that also lowered my inhibition to initiate. I also did not last as long while having sex and felt ashamed and embarrassed and like I was not pleasing her which did not help my drive. Put soon that passed and the feelings both emotionally and physically were more intense because I was sober. Now I am always in the mood and my wife and I are no longer intimate she is being a gatekeeper for whatever reason.
1 Like
Sobriety definitely affects sex drive. I cannot speak for any other relationships, because the one I’m in now is the first sober one I’ve ever had. But my gf now says that sobriety and step work brought to the surface some sexual abuse memories and related trauma that had been suppressed while she was using, so sex causes her some anxiety at times. So there’s that.
I can only speak from my own experience, lost interest in this aspect of life for years. It took some changes in my behavior, self care, & healing but it has come back.